Necessary business with Disfellowshipped ones

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    Quarterback posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 02:59:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 299 of 2091
    Joined 10/24/2010

    I was reading our study article for next week's WT study There is a subheading in there about Treatment of Disfellowshipped ones.

    In one paragraph they slam the term, "Necessary Business" when dealing with a family member who is DF'd.

    This is so confusing. In one hand they have coined that phrase "necessary business" with relatives that have DF relatives. Now, on the other hand they turn it around and say you can't do it, or that people are missapplying it.. They don't tell you how to apply it, but they sure like to tell you how not to apply it. I don't know where the GB is going with this. Probably they are wishing they could detract this from the publications, but it is there.

    What else can they do? As long as they have difficult rules that some can't follow they are going to have DFing and they will always have to prove to the media that ....no we don't tear families apart for shunning them....see they can have necessary business with them(but, don't ask us what that means)

    M wobble posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 10:30:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 5277 of 5745
    Joined 2/20/2008

    The usual mind-control technique, they know that most who love their family members have used the "necessary business" tag to cover just about any contact, and why the hell not ?

    They are just trying to exercise more control, they know that many Dubs will now limit their contact with DF'd family to just what is truly necessary, of course the stronger minded will say "stuff you" to the GB and carry on as before.

    They are a nasty vindictive cult, nobody can leave without pain, they make sure of that, the problem is that for some vulnerable ones who have been DF'd this can lead to depression and suicide, not that the heartless bastards who head the WT care one bit.

    Alfred posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 11:23:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 401 of 954
    Joined 9/10/2010

    Ambiguity is probably the most widely used mind-control technique used by the WT... not only does it create dependency for "guidance", it also helps mitigate any possible legal action against the borg...

    Scully posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 12:29:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 16701 of 13520
    Joined 11/2/2001

    Rule of thumb when applying the term Necessary Family Business™:

    If you need money, are ill or require other manner of material support, and would otherwise have to rely on JW Friends™ or the Congregation™ for such assistance, then contact with DF'd relatives as Necessary Family Business™ is permissible.

    If your DFd relative(s) need money, are ill or require other manner of material support, then fuck 'em.

    erbie posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 12:43:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 59 of 427
    Joined 9/3/2011

    Scully, you've probably just about summed it up in the clearest way possible.

    Perhaps you should submit your little statement for inclusion in a future Watchtower publication. I think it would clarify an issue that plagues many of The Watchtower's most sincere and faithful followers.

    However, you may have to substitute 'em for them as they do like to use the correct English grammar!

    JRK posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 12:55:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 936 of 1540
    Joined 5/27/2009

    As a disfellowshipped person, the only "necessary business" my sisters have with me is when they WANT SOMETHING! Greedy pricks.

    JK

    Pams girl posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 13:07:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 635 of 1234
    Joined 2/6/2011

    Typical conundrum with the garbled messages from the GB....

    They can tell you what to do, but not how to apply it in real life in this instance. Gives them more leverage to dissfellowship when they find out what youve been up to "behind our backs!"

    yourmomma posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 16:03:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 585 of 1039
    Joined 11/26/2007

    IMO, they are gradually heading toward a DF policy like scientology has, which is basicly zero contact. Towards the end of my attenting meetings 3+ years ago, even buying groceries for a relative sick with cancer was frowned upon. In fact, I believe that also taking a DF relative to the doctor was stated at an assemby as "not family business".

    M BluesBrother posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 16:52:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 6804 of 8627
    Joined 10/29/2001

    WT July 15 2011 p 31

    "But what will these dear parents do? Will they obey Jehovah's clear direction? Or will they rationalize that they can have regular association with the disfellowshipped son and call it "necessary family business"? In making their decision they must not fail to consider how Jehovah feels about what they are doing"

    (below a picture of a man walking out the door with a suitcase and weeping parents)

    In reality the attitude of the dubs varies enormously. I have known some that have almost normal relations and others who cut them dead..............

    Over the page it says (par 17) after discussing Nadab and Abihu who were struck dead.

    "Today, Jehovah does not immediately execute those who violate his laws . He lovingly gives them an opportunity to repent from their unrighteous works. How would Jehovah feel though, if the parents of an unrepentant wrongdoer kept putting Him to the test by having unnecessary association with their disfellowshipped son or daughter?"

    Make of that what you will ....

    M DaCheech posted Wed, 21 Sep 2011 16:59:00 GMT(9/21/2011)

    Post 4859 of 6646
    Joined 5/13/2004

    Can't understand why authorities don't catch up to this as "unfair business practice" and/or "discrimination"

    DesirousOfChange posted Thu, 22 Sep 2011 18:28:00 GMT(9/22/2011)

    Post 780 of 5145
    Joined 1/13/2011

    Can't understand why authorities don't catch up to this as "unfair business practice" and/or "discrimination"

    In this context it's applying to family relationships. No laws apply. While you cannot pick who your family members are, you can decide not to associate with them for any or no reason. Period.

    However, in the US, if they were to instantly "cut off" business relationships, that is, firing employees because they got DFd, or cancelling leases to residential rental property, then I think they would be opening themselves up to religious discrimination lawsuits. However, relationships with subcontractors etc are not subject to the same discrimination laws.

    In the past, the "family business" exception was tolerated for almost anything. Elders were to stay clear of determining what constituted "family business". Only if the amount of associated with DFd famly members became an issue in the congregation, then those persons may no longer qualify for privledges -- Elder, MS, Pioneer, etc. but associating with DFd family members could never be cause to DF anyone. If there was no family relationship, that is a different story. One warning, or a brazen attitude about it and YOU'RE OUT!

    Surely, evidently, it is reasonable to conclude.... (like that terminology?) this article is an attempt to tighten up on the flagrant association with DFd family and will no doubt be used to strongarm those who "abuse" the exception.

    DOC

    out4good3 posted Thu, 22 Sep 2011 18:39:00 GMT(9/22/2011)

    Post 899 of 1251
    Joined 1/13/2002

    If you need money, are ill or require other manner of material support, and would otherwise have to rely on JW Friends™ or the Congregation™ for such

    assistance, then contact with DF'd relatives as Necessary Family Business™ is permissible.

    If your DFd relative(s) need money, are ill or require other manner of material support, then fuck 'em.

    Don't see how it can be any clearer than that.

    mythreesons posted Thu, 22 Sep 2011 19:26:00 GMT(9/22/2011)

    Post 149 of 266
    Joined 2/22/2010

    My parents apply 'Necessary Family Business' as ONLY when someone in the family is expected to die and is in the hospital. Other than that there is nothing 'necessary'.

    The sad part is they apply this 'Necessary Family Business' to me and my wife and kids, and we are inactive. Well, we did tell them we could no longer follow men....;)

    Cult 101

    M Pistoff posted Thu, 22 Sep 2011 21:50:00 GMT(9/22/2011)

    Post 2423 of 3462
    Joined 7/8/2002

    "But what will these dear parents do? Will they obey Jehovah's clear direction? Or will they rationalize that they can have regular association with the disfellowshipped son and call it "necessary family business"? In making their decision they must not fail to consider how Jehovah feels about what they are doing"

    That is what they say to the rank and file.

    The reality is this:

    The 2010 Flock book says that associating with df'd immediate family members is not a judicial matter.

    So, what they want to bluff by us is not the same as what they will prosecute.

    sd-7 posted Thu, 22 Sep 2011 22:13:00 GMT(9/22/2011)

    Post 1972 of 3760
    Joined 7/31/2009

    My mom pretty much referenced this article today and has indicated that she's going to limit our dealings to 'necessary business'. It was like talking to a zombie version of my mom. I've never heard her sound like that.

    This is kinda new, so I'm really pissed off right now. These bastards are asking for souls and giving lies in return. Well, so be it. "If you will be turned...you will be destroyed!"

    --sd-7

    DesirousOfChange posted Thu, 22 Sep 2011 22:17:00 GMT(9/22/2011)

    Post 783 of 5145
    Joined 1/13/2011

    The sad part is they apply this 'Necessary Family Business' to me and my wife and kids, and we are inactive.

    Ask them when they decided that they have the authority to "go beyond the things written" (even what is written by the WT Society)?

    Total lack of humility to the F&DS.

    DOC

    mythreesons posted Fri, 23 Sep 2011 00:40:00 GMT(9/23/2011)

    Post 151 of 266
    Joined 2/22/2010

    DesirousOfChange: They've been told countless times that this is a test of THEIR loyalty to God. They take everything that is said and go overboard with it!! They think the ONLY way to get us to 'snap out of it' is to treat us as if we are DF'd! What a CROCK!

    Dad is an elder and he's talked so much through the years, telling people what to do, how to treat their own family members, telling people how he and mom raised such good kids in the 'truth'. Telling them exactly what to do to make sure your sons become bethelites and elders. OH THE IRONY.....toot, toot....toot, toot....wait a sec....OH SH_T...now what is he gonna tell people. Now he has to live the way he's been telling people for years. I mean he can't try to win us over now by showing love, that would be going against everything he ever said.

    Vanderhoven7 posted Fri, 23 Sep 2011 00:55:00 GMT(9/23/2011)

    Post 354 of 1759
    Joined 9/4/2010

    booked

    ziddina posted Fri, 23 Sep 2011 02:22:00 GMT(9/23/2011)

    Post 5511 of 10450
    Joined 4/8/2009
    "Ambiguity is probably the most widely used mind-control technique used by the WT... not only does it create dependency for "guidance", it also helps mitigate any possible legal action against the borg..."

    Extremely well put, Alfred!

    St George of England posted Fri, 23 Sep 2011 10:35:00 GMT(9/23/2011)

    Post 1153 of 2573
    Joined 3/22/2010

    I thought paragraph 14 was one of the most hypocritical statements I have read in a WT. Especially in the light of the (im)famous Awake-

    *** g 7/09 p. 29 Is It Wrong to Change Your Religion? ***

    Although the Bible makes a clear distinction between true and false teachings, God allows each person the freedom to choose how he or she will respond. (Deuteronomy 30:19, 20) No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family. Does study of the Bible lead to family breakup? No. In fact, the Bible encourages a husband and wife who practice different religions to remain together as a family.—1 Corinthians 7:12, 13.

    George

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