Kathie Byron, TheWork.com. Experiences?

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    Hoffnung posted Fri, 18 Nov 2011 19:38:00 GMT(11/18/2011)

    Post 246 of 379
    Joined 11/22/2010


    I just attended a "Reducing your Stress" training, sponsored by my company, and training staff used the methods of "theWork", founded by Kathie Byron. In order to reduce your stress, you have to inquire yourself and put everyting you believe in, in doubt. By the end of the 2 day work shop, I have all my "cult" warning lights on. Checking their internet site (www.thework.com) and reading some experiences on some forums, only seem to confirm my fears. Does anyone have an experience with "TheWork" or Kathie Byron? Is it safe to use? Your help is well appreciated.

    Best Regards,


    F Dagney posted Fri, 18 Nov 2011 20:27:00 GMT(11/18/2011)

    Post 3155 of 4681
    Joined 8/14/2006

    Yes I have. I used it to help me with the anger issues I was carrying after I left JW. It helped me tremendously change the "story" in my head by taking each issue/feeling and asking, "is it really true?" I am sort of "self-help lite", and try to just get the help I need to work through something and I move on. I get pretty bored with too much of any of the self help. And now, I get REALLY bored.

    With that being said, I guess people are always looking for something for the answers to life, success...etc. I'm amazed when I think about those intelligent people that stayed in the sweat lodge of that nutcase in AZ, some dying. I can't for the life of me figure out why no alarm went off in their head that much power given to a person is crazy.

    I haven't looked at Byron's stuff in years. But I know I was impressed with her original story.

    Hoffnung posted Fri, 18 Nov 2011 21:25:00 GMT(11/18/2011)

    Post 247 of 379
    Joined 11/22/2010

    Hello Dagney,

    Thank you for replying. I feel most of the stuff is quite usefull, untill the "turn-around". It felt like I had to put EVERYTHING into question. Since waking up from the Society's doctrine, I do not want to become that much unhinged, and risking to become a victim of some strong minded other person. Many techniques felt too confusing to be helpful. But that is just my experience & perception.


    F Dagney posted Fri, 18 Nov 2011 21:57:00 GMT(11/18/2011)

    Post 3156 of 4681
    Joined 8/14/2006


    Honestly, I forget everything involved with "The Work." (sounds creepy doesn't it?) I just used the questions to break down issues in my head I couldn't get a handle on. The worksheet or whatever helped me look at things from a different perspective. And, I was pretty much alone trying to sort out leaving JW, not on a DB, so i really needed help to cope with the big changes that were happening. For me it was anger, sadness of the waste of years/time...much of what everybody goes through when they figure out the "truth about the truth."

    I am terrible at being too involved or dedicated to anything...maybe a sort of ADD or something. I went to a 2 day workshop 5-6 years ago with my family that was pretty helpful also. But now when it comes to town I ask myself if I should go...and I think "Nahhh." I'd rather go to a museum. But it is so traumatic to leave everything and everybody you know...it's like jumping off a cliff. I was really alone then and had no clue what I was going to do. Anything that helps you "make it through the night, is alright...alright" in my opinion.

    I think it is really wise to listen to your gut if something doesn't feel right. As a witness your are taught NOT to listen or lean on your "own understanding." In the end, it is the best thing you can do for yourself.

    Hoffnung posted Fri, 18 Nov 2011 22:10:00 GMT(11/18/2011)

    Post 249 of 379
    Joined 11/22/2010

    Great advice. My gut feeling says, it is usefull up to a point. And that is as far as I want to go with it. It is too promising without being clear about how the promise will be fulfilled. And that is way too familiar to be trustworthy. I very much understand that the making oneself conscious about the power you have yourself over your own interpretations, thoughts, feelings and believes, helps you to let go of the grip that the society has on you. But that is also where the end point of the usefulness of the techniques is reached.


    M JeffT posted Fri, 18 Nov 2011 23:21:00 GMT(11/18/2011)

    Post 5727 of 7126
    Joined 6/4/2001

    Just did a little research on her. Sounds like a cross between EST (whcih I did after it changed to The Forum) and a 12 step program. Could be some useful stuff there, but some of it sounds over the top. I did not continue with EST and eventually they stop calling. I'm still involved in AA, but it doesn't cost anything and it involves a lot less control over my individual decisions.

    I would approach this one with caution.

    bikerchic002 posted Sat, 03 Dec 2011 16:32:00 GMT(12/3/2011)

    Post 6 of 23
    Joined 9/22/2011

    If I may inject a correction here. It is actually Byron Katie

    Great stuff and I truly believe this kind of help, or any help that resonates with you and what you may be dealing with or need at the time comes when we need it most. Like most help we don't need it forever, nor might we want to hang onto it as a crutch but just to get us through and teach us so we can move on.

    Oh and my experience with Byron Katie, yes she helped me to get out of that circular thinking my JW upbringing taught me. It makes you really think about situations in your life which may be limiting you or holding you back. Anyway thanks for the reminder of her incredible work.

    Band on the Run posted Sat, 03 Dec 2011 18:49:00 GMT(12/3/2011)

    Post 3274 of 9876
    Joined 12/18/2010

    A good friend organizes her entire life around The Work. B/c I was interested in it, I visited the website and she let me borrow books. I was very disappointed. I see how my JW upbringing has me go bonkers whenever someone argues that something is 100% perfect. When I was in pain, a doctor urged me to attend public AA meetings b/c I would be with other suffering people in a community. The concepts seemed ok but the actual administration on the ground screamed JWs. Even down to grey folding metal chairs. The people were extremely doctrinaire. I read the basic books. IN their zeal, they added stuff.

    Sometimes I wonder if my skepticism does not prevent me from having a crutch that others use to help get by with life.

    Many times I've attended groups where everyone rah-rah, just like the Witnesses. I would develop some friendships and after time passed, ask them what they really thought. Most agreed with my take.

    I don't Byron Katie is dangerous but I see nothing new in the work. Marketing seems to be the major factor for the popularity. I always wonder what my normal brain would respond to if the JW garbage was not already there.

    The absolute last straw for me is when people announce you must come here or die. AA. I am the only one who can help you. from dentists during my pain siege actually translated into I am a hack with no ethics. I am here to take all your cash and more with no results. Once I ran out of a dentist's office b/c a young woman was engaging in the same repartee with the dentist that my father and I had.

    designs posted Sat, 03 Dec 2011 18:56:00 GMT(12/3/2011)

    Post 7812 of 19404
    Joined 6/17/2009

    Band- You're right everything has become 'Marketing', we are in the age of signing people up for something. The chiroprator who wants you to come in every week for the rest of your life, the Dentist, the Gym, the Annuity aaargh!

    I think we are learning to take a piece of something that has value and standing up for ourselves and saying No to the rest.

    alias posted Sat, 03 Dec 2011 18:59:00 GMT(12/3/2011)

    Post 590 of 627
    Joined 11/8/2000

    Great stuff and I truly believe this kind of help, or any help that resonates with you and what you may be dealing with or need at the time comes when we need it most. Like most help we don't need it forever, nor might we want to hang onto it as a crutch but just to get us through and teach us so we can move on.

    Love this bikerchic. As a raised-in JW who's been denied worldly philosophy for my first 30 years, I'm curious about different approaches and tools some have found useful in working through their own "stuff". The four questions alone are a good primer into self-awareness and interesting to use when assessing personal beliefs (and really understanding the JW mindset).


    "Take what's useful and leave the rest" class

    Band on the Run posted Sat, 03 Dec 2011 19:21:00 GMT(12/3/2011)

    Post 3277 of 9876
    Joined 12/18/2010

    The is it true part is classic Cognitive/Behavioral Therapy. Advanced work is available through almost every teaching inst'n. It is academic. I think the concepts are excellent and pragmatic. Much faster than normal therapy. There is no cult element present in it.

    When you read prof. journal in C/B therapy, there is analysis and criticism of other therapists. Anyone who says "this is it" is dangerous. C/B does hardcore science and math to figure out some efficacy level or to filter out who wil benefit the most or the least. The Work doesn't do so.

    I was puzzled by why my well-read, aritculate friend was so enamored of it.

    bikerchic002 posted Sat, 03 Dec 2011 22:15:00 GMT(12/3/2011)

    Post 7 of 23
    Joined 9/22/2011

    Hey nice to know someone "gets me"!


    "Take what's useful and leave the rest" class


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