Calling All Ex Witnesses

It's me again...Most of you don't remember me, but I am in need of personal experiences and comments that you may help me out with.

 

I met someone online who has apparently turned out to be a good associate of mine. However, she has informed me that though she has her own beliefs and hates religion itself, she does like to get different perspectives on what people believe. I informed her that i was an Ex Jehovah's witness. Immediately she said 'oh i have a person that comes and speaks to me about that on a regular basis.'

Now EVERYONE that use to be a JW KNOWS where that is heading.....yes? EVERYONE understands what the 'intent' of this 'sister that meets' her is trying to do......yes?  I informed her vaguely of what the witnesses had done to me perosnally. She ran out of time (being that it's 1:30am) because her boyfriend was trying to get to sleep. So i informed her tha ti would email her my experiences with the JW's. 

I am asking anyone and everyone that might be interested in contributing to this EMAIL. I want this email to be NICE...but HONEST, and TRUTHFUL. So, I thought 'what better place to get information about people's experiences and what Jehovah's Witnesses believe then this site? Anyone willing to contribute about how they were personally treated by the jws...and offer any information about their false doctrines that i might have forgotten to place...would be GREATLY appreciated. Just make your post.....and make your claim....be heard. We all know how jws work...and quite frankly...though i've not known her for a long period of time..i also don't want her to get stuck in the Borg.  Thanks guys....i appreciate it.

Feel free to use my bio!

I remember you  - I used to sign here under a different name and then lost all my details - couldn't be bothered to chase them up, so started a new account.

How's it going dude.

This is my first post when I joined the forum. It's a commentary of my entering and exiting the organisation. Hope this does the trick.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/87372/1452609/post.ashx#1452609

Hi Fiveshadow's friend,

I'll give you my own impression of Jehovahs Witnesses.  I was a baptised witness for 10 years and I left at the age of 25. 

The JWs are most certainly a cult. If you read about cult characteristics online that will confirm it.  They do believe that theirs is the only "true" christian group in the world and that God will destroy those who are part of "false religion" i.e. any religion that is not JW.  Some JWs will admit that God *might* save some others who are not JWs IF and only IF they are exceptional in heart or if they have not had the chance to join the JWs for some reason (like living in a remote area where noone preached to them).  But generally they do think that 99% of the worlds population will be killed at armageddon and the only way to be sure of your survival is to be a JW.

This means that JWs are very fearful.  If a JW leaves (to join another religion for instance) they are "disassociated" and shunned completely by their JW friends and family.   Many JWs will deny that family shunning goes on, but it is true because I've seen shunning (my friend just got disfellowshipped and her mother, father and siblings have completely cut her off).   So you can see the level of control that this group may have.  If you are JW and you have doubts, you simply cannot question the authority of the Watchtower society (they disfellowship those who openly question the doctrines), you cannot leave without losing all your friends and family, if you do leave, you might be plagued by the idea that God is going to kill you.   They even teach that God does not listen to the prayers of someone who has left the JWs.

The positive aspects of the religion are that there is a real sense of community in the JW kingdom halls.  They do socialise with each other (but not with those who are not JWs...that is frowned upon by use of a scripture which says "bad associations spoil useful habits" 1 cor 15.33 - I remember that scripture because it was drummed into me as a teenager.  Anyone NOT JW is a bad association).  There is a real boost to your ego being a JW - why?  because you think you know all the answers.  You think you are part of the elite group of humankind who has the "accurate knowledge" and that all the churches are totally deluded.  I remember now (and I cringe inside with shame) how I used to ridicule the churches and laugh at them with my JW friends....we'd say "how stupid they are!  how could they possibly believe such a ridiculous doctrine like the trinity!  they obviously NEVER read their bibles!"  We were so arrogant.  It made me feel good when I stood up in the JW kingdom hall and gave talks from the bible (all the talks are closely monitored and the information is from the Watchtower society). 

I'd knock on doors and when someone was interested it was an opportunity to recruit.  If you recruit someone, your status in the JWs goes up.  You write down on a sheet of paper how many hours you preached in a month, how many books or magazines you gave out and how many "bible studies" you hold.  A bible study is when you visit someone in their home and speak to them regularly about the bible, always using a Watchtower book as the study guide (another cult tactic because the books are designed to brainwash).  If you're having regular visits you'll be listed as the JW's "bible study".  The whole point of this study is to get you to attend the hall, then to get you to join and go out preaching, then get baptised.  If you get baptised you must attend all the meetings (3 a week) plus go out knocking on doors (or risk being considered a "bad association" or "weak"). 

You get the idea?!   This reporting of the preaching a JW does is a way of keeping control on the JWs.  Anyone not preaching for enough hours could be "counselled" to preach more.  For men, the only way to increased status is to obey all the rules, attend all the meetings, do regular "talks" at the hall AND preach for at least 10 hours a month.  A regular JW male can become a "ministerial servant" by doing all of this, then later might be promoted to "elder".  A JW male who is neither of these is considered "weaker" than one who achieves this status.

Women do not get any titles, except if they choose to knock on doors full time (70 hours per month) and then they're called a "pioneer" which means that most of the congregation think they're "strong" and a "good associate" (no matter what they're really like as a person!).   Women can do talks but they cannot address the congregation, they have to sit on stage and talk to another woman, while everyone listens.  (this is part of the women can't teach the congregation rule....the head of the congregation is Christ, the head of the woman is the man. etc.)    Women who are married are to be "in subjection" to their husbands.  That means that the husband has the final decision on everything.  She must "honour" him.  The husband is told to love his wife like she is a "weaker vessel" which apparently means that women are more fragile and should be treated with care.  Unfortunately there is so much wife and child beating in the JWs - the men take it literally that they are the "head" of the woman, aswell as "spare the rod spoil the child" philosophy.  They say the bible teaches that children should be physically disciplined.

The problem of child abuse in Jehovahs Witnesses is very serious and very widespread.  I know that other religions have also had this problem, but there are differences with the JW religion.  Firstly the JWs have a rule where "two witnesses" are required to confirm any wrongdoing.  Therefore if a child reports to the elders of a congregation that they have been abused, the elders will ask the child to produce two witnesses to confirm the wrongdoing.  The child is one witness....but as you know, it is unlikely that anyone else was there apart from the abuser!  So they fail (and have failed many times) to act and they have even been known to not inform the authorities.  The reason they don't inform the authorities is because the JWs have a rule about "not taking your brother to court" and "not bringing reproach upon Jehovah's organisation".  So they'll do everything to keep anything dirty out of the media and out of the public eye.   They've even accepted an abusers "apology" when he / she has admitted to abuse.....and still not informed the authorities!   Just recently the scandal came out, but they still haven't changed their 2 witnesses to the abuse rule.  They said in a letter that "if the law states that you must report it (in your area) then you must report it" but they are clearly saying that if the law where you live does not enforce reporting it, you don't have to!  Interestingly, the first thing elders must do in the case of abuse is not ring the police....no...they must ring the Headquarters of the Watchtower.  Very revealing.

Add to all this the totally wierd doctrines....like Jesus returned invisibly in 1914 and he still hasn't DONE anything from heaven (how convenient).  They said 1914, 1918, 1919, 1925, 1952, 1975 could be years for the end of the world and it didn't happen...so they said "we never said it definately would!  why did you all sell your houses?" LOL   They say blood is to be avoided, but then they allow JWs to accept blood fractions (which IMHO is totally hypocritical!!!).  They didn't allow organ transplants for a while, so JWs died because of it, then they said, OH we think organ transplants are OK now, without any apology to the families of those who died because of their silly doctrine.  And what is all this about 144000 going to heaven?  They take that number in revelation literally but admit that the rest of the chapter is symbolic (surely the number 144000 is symbolic as a calculation relating to the 12 tribes of israel?).   That is just scratching the surface of the strange teachings they have.

They'd have you think that they are just a nice little christian group.  This is how they recruit - lull you into a false sense of security and gradually get you to accept all of these wierd doctrines.

Don't get me wrong, many of them are sincere. I have family who are JWs and they really do believe it.  I know, I believed it too, until I did my research and realised how truly ignorant I'd been.  I cringe now at how I critisised other religions, because since leaving JWs I have met some people whose knowledge of the bible would put any JW to shame.  I've met people so deeply spiritual and I realise I never knew what spirituality was when I was a JW.

Sirona

 

Five,

With Pleaure!!!!!

One very important thing to remember is that Jehovah's Witnesses take their religion VERY seriously.  It is their life and no one and nothing else matters.  They take it all literally.  Not like religions that ban birth control and the people have small families anyway.

If Jehovah's Witnesses banned birth control, you better have a darned good reason for having a small family!!!

Another VERY IMPORTANT thing to keep in mind is that you are not to have friends or close ties to outsiders, including family.  In the beginning, the Jehovah's Witnesses will suger-coat this fact. 

It is VITAL that anyone considering becoming one of Jehovah's Witnesses remember that outside friends are not allowed.  The reason is that it gives the Jehovah's Witness organization too much power over your life.

Never give away the power over your life!!

Ask a Jehovah's Witness if they have  close friends, I emphasize CLOSE FRIENDS outside of the religion, then listen VERY CAREFULLY to the answer, you will find that they give a vague or deceitful anwser.  Such as "we are friendly with all people"  To be friendly with all people is not the same as having close friendships!!!!!

Be Careful!!!

Deb, an ex-Jehovah's Witness

By the way, I was a very devoted, raised to it, Jehovah's Witness.  I believed passionately and with all my heart. 

Hi Fiveshadows, I can undestand why you feel a strong need to inform your friend, I think we would all react the same in this situation!  But perhaps you could redirect her to this website, tell her to be openminded to the information she is reading, so that she can get a balanced view and make a decision for herself.  Perhaps give her just some background on the people that post here. 

froglett xox

My bio-

I have a few tidbits to add. 

Make sure you explain to her that it is often not until after baptism that you find out all the many many rules you are expected to live under or face 'marking' or shunning.  When you are studying, they love to talk about a lot of things being a 'conscience' matter--but how conveniently that changes after baptism, suddenly your privileges within the congregation can be taken away over so-called 'conscience' matters.

Many repentant individuals are still disfellowshipped.

You are never ever to question any beliefs or do your own research as that is labeled 'apostacy'.

Any interests, hobbies, vacation time, people you spend time with, preaching time, basically everything and anything in your life that you enjoy will now come under a magnifying glass of scrutiny and everything is related to Satan and the 'world'.

All humans outside the JW's are evil people about to be destroyed.

Tons of information on the internet about all the lies, deception and false prophecies of the WBTS, but oh yeah you are not allowed to read that.

I could go on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, etc, etc, etc, etc.

Hi

I have some big articles about the process of becoming a JW.  If you pm me with an email address I'll send you the file.  Can't recall which website I downloaded it from, but its good.  Pity my friend is past the stage where he'll look at it.

Feel free to use my bio in my profile and also an extended version of the bio under my Topics.

Good Luck!

Cathy L.

Talking to one of Jehovah's Witnesses? I'm sure he or she is very nice. Most are, in my opinion. I have a great deal of love for many, many Jehovah's Witnesses. In fact more than thirty members of my family are in the organization, since our family has a long history in it for four generations and more than sixty years.

Why do I love Jehovah's Witnesses? They look forward to a time when the earth will be a paradise and all humans will then live in perfection and happiness. This common hope can inspire love and a special kind of unity. They're not perfect, and you'll see this from time to time, but who is perfect, right?

As you continue your association with this Jehovah's Witness, there are a few things I'd like you to know.

1) The Watchtower Society, the official agency in charge of the organization of Jehovah's Witnesses, encourages young ones to be baptized quite young; thirteen or fourteen years of age.

2) While the baptism oaths used to require those getting baptized to acknowledge God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit, in 1985 it was changed to require those getting baptized to acknowledge the Watchtower Society as "God's spirit-directed organization."

3) Being a baptized Jehovah's Witness requires you to recognize as God's sole channel of communication to humans - only those in association with the Watchtower Society. Although they may not mention it at first, they believe that unless you are baptized as one of Jehovah's Witnesses--and have a full share in their meetings and field service activity--you will die at the soon-to-come Armageddon, along with everyone else on earth who has not done these things.

4) If you become baptized and later decide you don't necessarily recognize those in association with the Watchtower Society as God's only channel of communication--and admit as much to others--you will almost surely be disfellowshiped and branded a wicked apostate, not even worthy of prayers. This means being shunned and vilified by all those--closest friends, family members, yes even your children--who are Jehovah's Witnesses. You will be identified as one of "The Evil Slave Class."

5) Trying to reason with the elders, your friends or family members that you are not deserving of such treatment is quite futile. Why? Because any Jehovah's Witness who does not submit to the enforced shunning is himself subject to being disfellowshiped and shunned if anyone finds out. This practice creates an environment in which people are fearful of anything the Watchtower Society has condemned, and in which people are reverse-incentivized to support anything they say.

6) If these things were to happen to you, during your judicial hearing you will be denied most of the rights generally afforded people in any sort of court. You are not given the right to have someone represent you, nor even the right to have witnesses of your choosing present. There will be no recording nor transcript of the proceedings. While they make sure there are three or more elders present to represent the Watchtower Society's interests, you are allowed no one to represent yours. You have no record of the hearing, no representation, no witnesses of your own; you have no concrete way to demonstrate that you were mistreated or that things weren't handled properly. Only your word (one person) against theirs (three persons.)

If, like me, you at some point become one of Jehovah's Witnesses, many wonderful things will be placed before you. Lots of literature containing beautiful artist's renderings of life on a paradise earth. Many experiences of how other people all over the world are becoming Jehovah's Witnesses. Frequent public talks that demonstrate how correct the Watchtower Society is in its increasing light regarding God's truth. You will be encouraged to read the Bible--along with publications from the Watchtower Society. And you'll find that "studying the Bible," while quite time-consuming, is not very difficult since it amounts to reading Watchtower publications and answering the accompanying, published questions from those corresponding paragraphs.

As one of Jehovah's Witnesses, you will frequently be told not to listen to those who disagree with the teachings of the Watchtower Society. They will spend less time teaching you about why these opposers are wrong--and more time sinply warning you not to pay attention. Note the following excerpt taken from the Watchtower magazine...

*** w86 3/15 p. 12 ?Do Not Be Quickly Shaken From Your Reason? ***

Now, what will you do if you are confronted with apostate teaching, subtle reasonings claiming that what you believe as one of Jehovahs Witnesses is not the truth? For example, what will you do if you receive a letter or some literature, open it, and see right away that it is from an apostate? Will curiosity cause you to read it, just to see what he has to say? You may even reason: **It wont affect me; Im too strong in the truth. And, besides, if we have the truth, we have nothing to fear. The truth will stand the test.** In thinking this way, some have fed their minds upon apostate reasoning and have fallen prey to serious questioning and doubt. (Compare James 1:5-8.)

You may find the logic circular and unsatisfying at first. Consider...

"This is Gods true organization."

"If so, why be afraid of hearing out an opposer?"

"Because they might lead you away from Gods true organization."

"But what if the opposers are right?"

"They cant be right since this is Gods true organization."

"But shouldnt such an organization withstand honest-hearted scrutiny?"

"Its thinking like that that has led many away from Gods true organization."

But if you give it time, in the presence of others who have accepted the organization as God's only true channel, you may find it becomes easier and easier to believe as they do. You may come to accept what they have: that there is no truth nor faith in God apart from faith in the Watchtower Society.

Although nearly all of my family members are Jehovah's Witnesses and although I myself served as an elder in the congregation, I now recognize that the organization is not what it purports to be. While there are many fine and wonderful people within it, there are many false and troubling things too. Things that cannot be excused as the simple shortcomings of imperfect men. They amount to gross deception, evil manipulation and idolatry.

These things are most difficult to see for those immersed in the culture surrounding the organization, who endeavor to separate themselves from all others, associating almost exclusively with one another. They are things one cannot comprehend without a willingness to give the organization a clear-minded, honest-hearted, objective investigation. Because the Watchtower Society threatens those who dissent with a branding of "apostate" and shunning, there is much fear in ones conducting such an investigation. The reasoning encouraged by the Watchtower Society requires the dogmatic rejection of any possibility that "what you believe as one of Jehovahs Witnesses is not the truth." I consider this out of harmony with the scriptures.

(2 Corinthians 13:5) Keep testing whether YOU are in the faith, keep proving what YOU yourselves are. Or do YOU not recognize that Jesus Christ is in union with YOU?

This month I will be 39 years old. I have only come into my present understanding of this organization in the last year. None of my Witness friends or family members--including my seventeen year old daughter--know how I feel. I am presently struggling with the most difficult decision I've ever had to make in my life. Either I voice my position and be considered demonized by my entire family along with the only community of friends I've known my whole life, being shunned as an evil enemy. Or living a lie.

Unlike the Watchtower Society, I will not tell you to run from what I believe to be wrong. I want you to understand it. Listen to them. Listen closely. But don't ever let them scare you from considering ALL the information. And don't ever let them tell you not to use the mind God gave you--in favor of zombie-like submission to a group of men. Men whose position as God's only channel they preserve by the threat of shunning upon those who dare suggest the emperor may have no clothes.

I don't know what the coming months hold for me. Please pray for me. I'll be praying for you.

Confession,

My prayers and thoughts are with you.  Please keep in touch with us, and if there is anything at all we can do to help other than through our prayers, then please ask...

May I have permission to show your post to my friend who is due to be baptised a JW this summer?

You absolutely have permission, Jaffacake.  Thank you for your comments.