Conscious Class: Do you still go in field service?

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    brotherdan posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 17:13:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    I know there are some of the "conscious class" on the board (i.e. yknot, miseryloveselders,elderelite,etc...) Do you guys still go in the field ministry? And if so, what do you focus on? Have you had to change your message since coming to the realizations that you have now? Do you feel guilty for going out in service? Has anyone noticed your change of approach in how you preach the gospel when going door to door?

    P.S - Please don't hate on this thread. Everyone is just trying to do what seems right to them at the time.

    Soldier77 posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 17:19:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Well, technically, I'm still 'in', I haven't gone out in FS in...uh... shiiiiit... 9 months now... I think I've been to less than a dozen meetings in the last 6 months. I can't go out in FS and say what they want me to say, I cannot in good conscience say the canned messages to try to sucker someone into this cult. If I had a partner in crime I would be preaching the real truth about the WTS... but I have no one I could do that with here...

    brotherdan posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 17:38:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    That'd be an interesting way to go out. Go door to door with an elder or pioneer, and in the middle of their presentation, bring up the fact that JWs are not true Christians and have declared numerous false prophecies.

    Witness My Fury posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 19:18:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Hell no!

    Cheers

    Joliette posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 19:31:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Joined 7/18/2010

    I havent been out in field circus in years brother dan but its pretty hard going out knowing what you what about the organization, society, etc.

    I hate the idea of handing out watchtowers and awakes

    Most of them end up on the bus seat anyways.

    wannabefree posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 19:35:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    I have been going but I don't expect to much longer. The amount of time I spend in the ministry has reduced drastically and approach has definately changed. I take return visits alone when possible and just pretend to ring the bell. When I do get somebody at home, I will share a scripture about the love God shows us through Jesus, I will encourage Bible reading ... the only literature I have left for months is the tract "Why You Can Trust the Bible" ... it is not preaching JW doctrine as far as I remember and it does not have a coupon to send in for more literature.

    And some have noticed. I have told them that I am trying a new approach. One who suspects things are heading to a certain conclusion and knows me well has thanked me in a roundabout way for not bringing up the subject and appreciates the time we have been spending together.

    F Mickey mouse posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 19:38:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    I just can't do it. Haven't for months.

    ele_lux posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 19:50:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    I'm struggling with that issue right now. I've only come to the realization that I'm not in the truth a little over two weeks ago. So i still handed in my october regular pioneer monthly report. Last time I went on service I was already doubting all of this, so I only conducted a study with two little kids. But I felt SO wrong. Their innocent minds being corrupted like mine was. I just couldn't do it anymore. So last sunday I didn't go, and i'm sure they were dissapointed because they love their study.... So I really don't know what to do. I have around 10 Bible students and I don't know how to go about them. I guess I'll just hand them to someone else because after all, it's their decission if they wanna become part of Jehovah's Witnesses, not mine. But I'm deffinitely not going on field service anymore.

    Has anyone been on this situation?

    wannabefree posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 19:52:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Welcome ele_lux ... sure would be interested in learning a little more background to your recent awakening ... amazing and congratulations

    brotherdan posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 20:13:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    ele_lux,

    Congratulations on beginning to come to your senses. It is a long and hard road, but only the hard roads are worth going down. Just keep doing your research and keep your mind open. Stay true to your own conscience and don't do anything that feels wrong. Just let God's Word guide your beliefs and actions instead of what men write.

    Along with Bible reading, it was helpful for me to read "Crises of Conscience". I was not an angry book like I had expected. It was thoroughly researched and made me feel ok with the doubts that I was having.

    Also, feel free to post your story on this site and ask any number of questions. There are people with every type of belief system and values on this site that can help in many different ways. There are many Christians here that really know their Bibles well.

    Ding posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 20:25:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Hi Ele_lux,

    You didn't say whether you're ready to leave the Society or whether you still need to stay in for family reasons.

    If you're prepared to leave, please consider your responsibility to tell your studies what you've found out rather than just turning them over to someone else who may bring them the rest of the way into something you now know isn't the truth. Your studies will think you still believe it.

    Obviously, if you have to stay in the organization that makes it a lot harder. If you're doing any studies with people without another JW present, it would probably be safe for you to tell the studies about your own doubts.

    Why don't you tell us a little more about your situation and see if others on the forum have good ideas as to how to handle the studies.

    ele_lux posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 20:28:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Thanks wannabefree. You have no idea how great it feels to have someone say "amazing and congratulations" when all others are saying I'm doomed....

    Well, I started pioneering at 13, a year after i got baptized. I had promised Jehovah I'd give him my all, so I was convinced that pioneering was my only consistent life choice. 2 years later though, I had to quit full-time service because i was forced into highschool (back then i thought schooling was evil, like the WT had taught me). The feeling of having betrayed Jehovah triggered clinical depression on me, and I've been depressed ever since. For many years I thought the only solution to my condition was pioneering again, but once I was finally out of college and free, I realized I felt so emotinally ill that I couldn't even do my time when I tried. So I started on medication of all sorts, but refused seeing a Psychiatrist.

    Influenced by a Bethelite friend and the CO's wife, I signed up for regular pioneering anyway. And it's been 2 horrible years of feeling guilty for not being able to make Jehovah happy... Through the years I'd had doubts regarding doctrine, and especially Organizational ways. But like many, I said to myself I was here for Jehovah, and I reminded myself I had promised to serve him forever...

    Until last october 20th, I was lying in bed in the middle of the night, giving myself a guilt trip for not wanting to go on service the next day, and for the first time I allowed myself to think "Jehovah is extremely hard to please, if only I could call the shots to my own life I wouldn't be so depressed...." But I started thinking of my family and thought it was impossible to quit. So I thought "what if i just killed myself?" (not a new thought for me), But same thing, I couldn't do that to my family....

    I finally realized the best way to die was at Armageddon, because no one would miss me and I would know for a fact that was the right thing to have happened to me. I fell asleep to that thought.

    The next morning, my little brother came into my room and noticed my gloomy look, and he was through with it. So he stroke a surprising conversation that revealed we were both very ungappy with "the Truth". That finally opened my eyes, and the second I allowed myself to THINK for myself, I had an endless list of reasons why the Jehovah's Witnesses could not be the one true religion. It was extremely surprising to me the feeling of FREEDOM and PEACE I had just admitting to myself that I was on the wrong path, and I needed to get off of it.

    Of course, that's when the hard stuff started. How do I tell my parents (I already sort of did)? Do I just stop attending the meetings and service? What about my Bible students? How do I tell my friends? I don't know anyone or anything about the world, how do I jump in? IS there a true religion? Is the Bible even inspired by God? Does God even exist????

    It's only been a couple weeks, so I'm still trying to figure out a lot of it. What I really feel right now is that I need to talk to others that have been through this, because my brother is just as clueless as I am. Difference is, he was never too active in the truth, so he doesn't have friends from the hall calling and e-mailing every day, and he's busy enough with college to not mind wasting a few hour at meetings and even Sunday service.

    If anyone would like to talk, my MSN messenger address is luxenmail@gmail.com.

    brotherdan posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 20:34:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Just sent you an email, lux.

    pirata posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 20:53:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Well, I just came to accept the fact that I'm in the hyprocrite class. I still do field service in a non-attention drawing manner (ie. hours not to low to draw any need for "encouragement" and not too succesfull so as not cultivate interest in the field). Based on the experiences here I think I'm going to be in the hypocrite class for quite a while if I want to be able to make inroads with my family before i share my true feelings. The only reason I'd come out earlier is if the mental strain gets too much too bear, or showstopper issues arise (shunning/blood). So far it seems manageable...

    Soldier77 posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 21:02:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    ele_lux, welcome to JWN! Congratulations on your awakening and even though the road may be rough exiting or transitioning 'out', it is all worth it, YOU are all worth it, don't let feelings of guilt or fear or the JW line, 'we're not worthy' get you down. Ever. You are doing excellent to think for yourself and remember, always make progress, don't let the active JWs bring you down again.

    sabastious posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 21:04:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    I've only come to the realization that I'm not in the truth a little over two weeks ago.

    Welcome!

    How can you be "in the truth" is the Truth some sort of container? Does it get hot in there?

    -Sab

    Ding posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 21:13:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Joined 8/27/2010

    Hi Lux,

    I'm sending you a PM (private message).

    You click on the envelope icon in the upper right corner to get these.

    Soldier77 posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 21:13:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

    Post 1105 of 1651
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    Sab go easy on the new one. Don't want to scare them off! Hehe.

    ele_lux posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 21:35:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Thank all of you guys so much. When you're a witness you come to believe that everyone outside the Organization (not "the truth", thanks Sab) is a horrible person. And ESPECIALLY so-called apostates, which i guess witnesses would say all of us are right now... But I see there's an amazing comunity out here and that gives me hope that this process won't be impossible to bear.

    ele_lux posted Fri, 05 Nov 2010 21:50:00 GMT(11/5/2010)

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    Joined 11/3/2010

    Hey Ding. I try to open your msg but it says

    Sorry, an error occurred while processing your request.

    and i can't see it. Will it open it later? Or can you e-mail me instead? luxenmail@gmail.com

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