bought my first lottery ticket today

My state now has a lottery, so I decided it was time to buy one.  I paid $2 for a powerball ticket, so now I need to figure out how to spend my winnings.  

I've never even looked at lotteries before, but the woman at the counter was nice enough to explain the different ones to me. 

Does your state have a lottery?

We have the lottery now.   Hey, if you win it big, will you share with me?   Please?

If you win, how much money can you give me?

I'll be happy to share my experiences with you. 

$2.  Another one starts down the slippery slope of decadence.  You have happified satan, this day.  And kicked jehovah in the shin.

S

Next week, he'll spend $6 and kick Jehovah in the arse!

As long as he doesn't spend $20 and kick him in the balls.  I think that would merit instant annihilation.

S

OH, Oh!  Yall are cracking me up!

I wonder if Brooklyn would turn down a donation made out of lottery winnings.  Hmmm.   Guess I won't be finding that one out any time soon. 

Lol you sure bet they wouldn't turn it down. "It is not up to our conscience to ascertain where the money came from if it is giving with a cheerful spirit..."

So, take lump sum or yearly payments?

Definitely lump sum.  You'll need it to show Rob and I a good time.

As long as he doesn't spend $20 and kick him in the balls. 

Well, that would just be foolhardy now wouldn't it?

You'll need it to show Rob and I a good time.

How much does a choker leash and riding whip cost nowadays anyway???

Uhhh goodnight Doe!

Hey the money goes to the schools. Thats a good thing!! If you can afford to lose $2 then its not a gamble now is it.

Yup.  And lots of college girls work at the titty bars.  I'm a firm belieiver in supporting education. 

My state has a state lottery and the Powerball. According to the Mega Millions website, states with Powerball will be getting Mega Millions soon and vise versa.

I bought my first lottery ticket maybe 3 weeks ago. My JW dad has played the lottery for years. Was caught by an elder's wife once, so the elders came over to talk to him. Since then he drives far enough out of town until that he feels comfortable no one will run into him. (I haven't gone to that extreme. I get them right in town).

I hope he never wins... He can't manage money and would end up in millions of debt. He says he'll donate a bunch of it to the WTS (freakin idiot). I guess that'd sooth his conscience for playing it all of these years. Then he says he'd help out brothers and sisters in need... the same idiots that he hides from when he buys the tickets because they'd turn him in. I'd probably be more inclined to use some of the money to run a nation wide Watchtower smear campaign in an attempt to hurt their membership base and finances, but I digress.

I think you are mistaken though... That 66 million dollar Powerball jackpot is mine on Wednesday!

(FYI, beseeching Satan for lottery winnings doesn't seem to work, at least not for me. Even if you bend over your bed, spread your cheeks and offer yourself to him. )

I've not bought any yet...but am considering it!