growing up scared of Armageddon

  

 
 
I lived with a foreboding, a sense of dread. I dreaded meetings. I dreaded service. I dreaded school and the never ending conflicts there. I dreaded home and living with a mother with untreated mental illness. I dreaded the thought of dying at Armageddon. I dreaded the idea of cleaning up the mess after Armageddon if I somehow survived. I dreaded demons. I dreaded homework and reading Watch Tower Publishing Corporation produced literature.

I lived as such a hostage as a child. No sports. No approvable friends available. No money. We lived in the country and our mother was too neurotic to drive a car so we were stuck at home during summers. No TV even till I was 12 or so. At first there wasn't even any furniture. Just the kitchen chair to sit on in the whole house and beds. No air conditioning or even a fan to sleep by. Not enough food or milk till I started high school.

The thing I liked best about high school was the hot, all I wanted lunch with all the milk I wanted to drink. At first I couldn't believe it. Then at 16 I left home, got a job and a car and life got better.
 
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I too grew up scared of armageddon. I used to wake up in the middle of the night in a panic. It was awful.

I'm glad so many people responded to this topic..

Leolaia,we must be around the same age,I started high school in Sept.83.I certainly never thought I would graduate...I was sure Armageddon would be here by then.I used to spend hours studying those pictures in the Paradise book,wondering why Jehovah would allow kids to die(and later when the Bible Stories book came out,I always felt bad for the baby with it's mother in the flood picture).

Scarlet,I also felt so bad for the people,I never wanted Armageddon to come because I didn't want anyone to die.My grandparents,who were he most important people in my life,weren't witnesses,so I didn't want Armageddon to come and desroy them.

Goatlike,you said something about getting second hand stuff that could be demonised.That reminded me of a funny story...When I was about 11 or 12,I was walking with my friend Naomi,and we found a really cool toy boat on the side of the road.I really wanted to keep it.I didn't because my friend rpped it out of my hands,threw it as far away as she could,and said "Don't touch it!It might be demonised!!"okaaaaaaaaaaay....

and finally,to Josh...your mom sounds a lot like mine..lol

 

I was also definately terrified of Amargeddon, and when I did anything "wrong" I would pray in tears begging for me not to be killed. Fear is a strong power over the mind, and I think one of the determining factors for a lot of my ex-friends and family remaining witnesses. Breaking past that fear can often take a long time, as it's been programmed into the witnesses over many years and especially as children when most vulnerable.