To all the newbies: How I've have adapted to life outside the Org

Hello All!

I haven’t been active in the forum for some time, but I keep reading your comments every few weeks. I’ve noticed that there are many new members. Welcome to JWD!!! J

I haven’t been in a meeting since July-Aug of 2008. A lot has changed for me in the last 2-3 years, since I discovered what a fraud this religion was. I used to be an Elder “born in the Truth”™.  I believed everything with all my heart. And I tried really hard to comply with all my obligations and “privileges” in the congregation.  I used to be depressed a lot, because I was tired and overworked. It really bothered me to see fellow Elders and CO’s more interested in “status” and following rules than helping the congregation at a personal level.  Everything changed when I opened my eyes and saw the real truth of this Organization.

Many of you may feel confused and sad when you “disconnect” from the cult, or when you realize that you’ve been deceived your whole life.  It’s important that you learn to enjoy your new “mind freedom” and enjoy every minute of your life without remorse.  It is not easy at first, but everything improves over time.

In my case, I’ve been reading a lot. Books from Steve Hassan, Rick Cross and other cult experts have been a great help in my recovery.  Also, I had the opportunity of meeting Ray Franz and read his books.  All the guilt, fear, depression and inadequacy feelings I had as a JW disappeared.

What else I’ve learned during my exit?  That there is plenty of good people in the world. Not everyone is a “wordly bad association”.  I’ve found new friends that love me without any religious-imposed conditions. People that sincerely care for me and my wife.

 Now I have time to have new hobbies.  I enjoy making breakfast for my wife every Saturday morning, and staying in bed until noon, without worrying about “preaching”.  I can work overtime if required by my employer. I can start a project in my house without thinking that “we have to prepare for the KM School”…

To make the long story short: I’m happier than ever with my life.  Do I have a worry-free life now? No. Do I have all the answers to life questions? No.  Is there another life after this one? I don’t know!  But what I know is that I have the freedom to search for the answers by myself!

Keep learning, studying and THINKING.  There is plenty to do and learn in this life.

Carpe Diem!

TTRP

Your awesome! Thanks TTRP.. I will.

Thank you for those words.  Preciate that

Beautifully said, RedPill!  It's good to see you.

Nice to not have to waste your time preaching or going to boasting sessions.  Nice to have money that you do not have to put into the Worldwide Pedophile Defense Fund.  Nice to not have to waste your summer vacations on that Grand Boasting Session.  Nice to be able to work without having to fit your work around your boasting sessions and field circus.

However, I am not kidding you--there is one aspect of living outside the cancer that is actually more work.  You have to do your own thinking.  While you were in, someone else did that for you so you didn't have the extra work of thinking.  Now, you have to do that work yourself.

Hey RedPill !!

Good to see you posting, and I am sure your positive thoughts are a real boost to all, not just Newbies. Seize the Day indeed !

That is what I like about being out, do what you damn well like with whoever,whenever, each day is EXCITING . When I was in it was so routine and boring.

I know what the Wiz is saying, but I always did my own thinking,just thought ,as i was born in too, that the W.T had something (wot ?)

In fact it was when they came out with something implying that they would do my thinking for me ,that made me start to fade. I was SO angry, I said to my Wife right there and loud in the K.H  "NOBODY does my thinking for me"  sadly many who are still in are mentally lazy and are happy to go with the flow, trouble is the flow is raw sewage.

Keep posting and thanks again,

Love

Wobble

Excellent post.

Thank you for sharing.

lisa

Freedom of thought - one of life's greatest pleasures, privileges and RIGHTS!!!

Thanks tooktheredpill.....always interesting to hear.

To make the long story short: I’m happier than ever with my life.  Do I have a worry-free life now? No. Do I have all the answers to life questions? No.  Is there another life after this one? I don’t know!  But what I know is that I have the freedom to search for the answers by myself!

tooktheredpill.... thank you for this.  I find JWs take any little bit of negativity a blow it out of proportion to prove that they have 'the truth' and that 'they are God's people' and that 'everyone else is bad'.  No one has all the answers but to live in fear and to be incapable of thinking for yourself are 2 products of the WTS that are causing destruction in peoples' lives.  They haven't served up the kool-aid yet, but they sure are slowly poisoning their members.   

Hey ttrp!

Nice to hear from you. I also I am out of the WT loop. I also read the forum all the time. I don't post too frequently, but I want to say hi to everybody!

Newbies you can escape too!

ootb

WTWizard said:

However, I am not kidding you--there is one aspect of living outside the cancer that is actually more work.  You have to do your own thinking.  While you were in, someone else did that for you so you didn't have the extra work of thinking.  Now, you have to do that work yourself.

You know, it sounds like a jest, but this is so true.  When one is born with a mandatory book of rules and absolute answers, it can take quite a bit of time and research to unravel it all.  It is not a comfortable time, to say the least, but it is so very worth it!

C'mon TTRP, there's got to be some weeping & tooth gnashing going on now that you belong to Satan.

Great post and thanks for the update.

om

Great bit of encouragement tooktheredpill, Thanks

Nice to meet you :0) It's so great to hear everyones experiences. I've been craving it for awhile now. I've read Crisis of Conscience and I'm still reading In search of Christian Freedom. I ordered Steve Hassans Combatting cult mind-control 2 days ago upon the recomendation of Flipper. I'll save the expensive one for later... My poor husband can't understand why I would ever spend so much money on books as I have in the last year ;).

WTWizard said: there is one aspect of living outside the cancer that is actually more work.  You have to do your own thinking.

This is just one of the things that stood out to me when I visited family for a Funeral this past April/May. One of my sisters was actually trying to encourage me to be reinstated I think...She said as a single mother she found it comforting that she didn't have to think about so many things. She could look up answers to issues from the WAtchtower instead. I kept my thoughts to myself but I thought it was sad that she thought this could pass for a good relationship with God which is what I'm sure she thinks she has.

Open Mind said: there's got to be some weeping & tooth gnashing going on now that you belong to Satan.

Haha  It's so funny how they tell us there's nothing out there for us outside of the Watchtower. how we will be attacked by demons and be so lost and unhappy. As soon as I realized I did NOT want to go back to them I became happy and my depression lifted. I really thought I was doomed for the rest of my life to be a depressed person. Oh, and I've never had any demon incidents..

~fmy

Terrific update TTRP!! It's inspiring.

Well said!  Thanks for the post.

tooktheredpill and finding my way - 

Welcome! May you have continued peace and happiness. 

best

Good to hear from you TTRP!

Thank you guys for your comments!

Heaven commented:  I find JWs take any little bit of negativity an blow it out of proportionto prove that they have 'the truth' and that 'they are God's people' and that 'everyone else is bad'. 

That is true, Heaven. Although sometimes I feel VERY angry for the mind control that the WT still has over some of my family members, I don't treat any JW unrespectfully.  (I'm not DF's or DA'd: I just "dissapeared", and I still see some of my old "friends" sometimes).  If you meet with a JW in the street and you sound bitter,  "you're an instrument of the Devil". If you say something against the Organization, you're an apostate.  They say that the people that "abandon Jehovah's organization" are destined to fail, or will become "unhappy,  God haters, hopeless inmorals, tatooed drug-addicts", and so on.

I believe that the best "revenge" we can have against the WT is being HAPPY and positive, no matter how hurt we are.

I think about the positive aspects of my present situation:  The WT don't have any control over me now. I'm no longer depressed. I am not spending 1 second of my time or 1 cent of my money in this man-made Organization. I feel like a "normal" human being now.

How many of you feel this way now?

TTRP